Posts tagged John Beck

Walk on the Wild Side Exposed: Rex Grossman is impersonating Cecil Lammey!

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Author’s Note: This was my planned defense for John Beck in our Fantasy Court segment scheduled for the October 20 broadcast of The Audible Roundtable. Unfortunately, we have suspicions that Rex Grossman tampered with my phone line so he could continue to impersonate our beloved host Cecil Lammey for the entire two hours and persecute (not prosecute) John Beck. Second, more serious note: Rex Grossman deserves credit for having the skill to even warrant consideration as an NFL starter and perform as well as he has at times. I’m piling on to an unfortunate situation for him, but I’m using him more as a character than the person he is.

Waldman: Your honor, the Audible jury, football fans – especially the victims in this case, the Redskins fans.  I’ve reviewed the evidence. So have a panel of preeminent expert witnesses I will call before you. Among them are Steve Young, Ron Jaworski, Greg Cosell, Dave Razzano, Dan Shonka, and a host of others who agree that Beck has the arm talent, mobility, poise, accuracy, and anticipation to develop into a good NFL starter. What has prevented Beck from doing so was a lack of a real opportunity.

There is no justice in the NFL. Life isn’t fair and John Beck didn’t cry about it. He didn’t cry when Bill Parcells never gave him a chance after the Miami Dolphins under Cam Cameron attempted, and failed to impersonate a football team. No, instead Parcells opted for one of of his patented big-armed, two-cent savvy Robo-QBs. Guys who might shout loud enough get Lammey’s attention, but can only look at one quadrant of the field at a time.

Beck didn’t cry when the Ravens let him go to Washington although we have written testimony that some Ravens players did, which we have also entered into evidence with this court.

And he didn’t cry when Mike Shanahan opted to give Rex Grossman the first chance to reveal his true colors.

But let’s get back to justice. What is justice. What is the intention of justice. The intention of justice is to see that the guilty people are proven guilty and that the innocent are freed. Simple isn’t it. Only it’s not that simple. However, it is the defense counselor’s duty to protect the rights of the individual as it is the prosecutions duty to uphold and defend the laws of fantasy football. But we want to win. We want to win regardless of the truth. We want to win regardless of justice. REGARDLESS! of who is guilty or innocent. WINNING…is everything.

And ladies and gentlemen of the Audible jury of listeners, the prosecution is not going to get John Beck TODAY! No…because I’M GONNA GET THE PROSECUTION! OUR PLAINTIFF!!! THE HONORABLE MOTORBOATING SON OF A BITCH CECIL “BIG-MEX” LAMMEY HAS BEEN KIDNAPPED AND IMPERSONATED BY DEPOSED REDSKINS QUARTERBACK REX GROSSMAN.

I HAVE VISUAL PROOF!

GROSSMAN, WHO WE DISCOVERED JUST MINUTES AGO HAS HIRED MATT JONES, THE ROCK N’ ROLL CLOWN,  TO DOPE LAMMEY AND CONFINE HIM IN THE MEN’S ROOM STALL OF AN IHOP IN ARVADA, Colorado SHOULD GO STRAIGHT TO THE WASHINGTON BENCH! THE SONOFABITCH IS GUILTY! THAT MAN IS GUILTY!

THAT MAN THERE!

THAT MAN THERE IS A SLIME!

HE IS A SLIME.

IF HE’S ALLOWED TO GO FREE  then something REEAAAALLLY wrong is goin’ on here!

Judge Bloom: Mr. Waldman you are out of order!
Waldman: YOUR’E OUT OF ORDER! YOU’RE OUT OF ORDER! THE WHOLE TRIAL IS OUT OF ORDA! THEY’RE OUT OF ORDA!  THAT MAN! THAT SICK, CRAZY, DEPRAVED MAN, THREW FOUR INTERCEPTIONS IN ONE GAME AND IT WASN’T EVEN CLOSE TO HIS WORST GAME AS AN NFL QUARTERBACK AND HE’D LIKE TO DO IT AGAIN! HE TOLD ME SO! IT’S JUST A SHOW!

IT’S  LET’S MAKE A DEAL! LET’S MAKE A DEAL!

HEY SIGMUND, YOU WANNA “MAKE A DEAL!” I GOT AN INSANE NFL QUARTERBACK WHO LIKES TO MAKE CRAZY THROWS, KILL OFFENSES, AND IMPERSONATE OUR AUDIBLE HOST!

WHADDYA GIMMEE SIGMUND, 3 WEEKS PROBATION?

I HEAR YOU OVER THERE GROSSMAN, YOU’VE BEEN EXPOSED. YOU JUST WISH YOU COULD STRAP ON THAT BIB AND MOTORBOAT RYAN TORAIN, BUT CECIL WOULD NEVER DO THAT! HE’D ONLY DO IT TO STEPHEN DAVIS OR JOHN RIGGINS!

Waldman: [to Grossman] You, you sonofabitch, you! You’re supposed to *hit the target!* You’re supposed to protect a lead! But instead you murder it!
[dragged out of court by bailiffs]
Waldman: You killed the Redskins! You killed them! Hold it! Hold it! I just completed my opening statement!

John Beck Redux

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If you’ve only been following this blog recently, you might have missed my post on John Beck. The Redskins quarterback was named the starter this morning. If you want to learn more about him check out my take. It has been my belief that one of the reasons Mike Shanahan opted for Rex Grossman to open the season was that it would give Beck a longer leash to grow into the starting role if Grossman failed to do the job first. If he had gone with Beck and the inexperienced pro QB struggled, his team and the fans would have been more impatient and demanded to get Grossman on the field.

Dan Shonka Part II: War Room Stories

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Even a player like Ray Lewis sometimes requires a scout like Dan Shonka to stand on the table for him. Photo by rubendn.

I think it’s accurate to describe Ourlads’ Dan Shonka as one of the ultimate practitioners of football evaluation. Shonka has 39 years of football experience as a player, college recruiter, college coach, and a combined 16 years as a NFL scout for National Scouting Service, the Philadelphia Eagles, the Washington Redskins, and the Kansas City Chiefs.

Last week, Shonka agreed to speak with me about scouting, players, and the NFL. The scheduled 60 minutes became two hours of football talk that flew by. Dan was afraid I got more than I bargained for, but I told him that I got exactly what I wanted – just more than I could have expected.

This segment of our conversation included war room stories about perhaps the greatest linebacker of a generation, a cornerback who had some great battles with Michael Irvin, a disruptive defensive tackle, and a backup running back from the University Texas whose first name is Anthony but went by a more holy moniker. Continue reading →

Dan Shonka Part I: Confidence and Competitiveness

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Former long-time NFL Scout Dan Shonka tells a great story where he had an epiphany about Peyton Manning at Tennessee. Photo by Jeffrey Beall.

Theory and practice, the ivory tower and the battleground. People will tell you that one is more beneficial than the other. I believe there’s not only a place for both, but they complement each other.

I think NFL Films senior producer Greg Cosell is one of the preeminent theorists of player evaluation. I call him a football theorist because he’s never played, coached, or scouted the game in an organization. Yet, this lack of practical experience doesn’t detract from his insights.

In many cases, it allows Cosell to step back and ask questions that NFL teams and personnel would like to think about. Chad Reuter is a similar kind of theorist. In fact he’s done research for NFL teams that lack the time or the knowledge to explore on their own. Thinkers have an important place in the world even if they purposely are doing work in quiet rooms away from the realities of the environments they study.

If Cosell and Reuter are football theorists, then I think it’s accurate to describe Ourlads’ Dan Shonka as one of the ultimate practitioners Continue reading →

NFL Films’ Greg Cosell Part I: Personnel Interrogation

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NFL Films senior producer Greg Cosell indulges my interrogation of his knowledge of league personnel. Giants DE Justin Tuck is one of many suspects. Photo by Chris Pusateri.

It might be a dream job, but NFL Films senior producer Greg Cosell understands what work is. The process of studying the game of football is a methodical one. Doing it well requires the attention and the appreciation of the minute detail, patience, and a large dose of humility.

Entering his third decade with NFL Films, Cosell has been studying football with this intense level of scrutiny longer than the average person reading this blog has been an adult. If football knowledge were gold then Raiders offensive coordinator Al Saunders’ appraisal of Cosell in a recent New York Times feature places the man behind the long-running ESPN program Edge NFL Matchup  on par with Fort Knox:

“Greg is just a brilliant man when it comes to” the strategic and personnel facets of the league, Raiders offensive coordinator Al Saunders said. “Tremendous insight, a tremendous knowledge of personnel, a great command of the intricacies of the game from a strategic standpoint.”

This week I will be featuring a recent conversation with Cosell Continue reading →

Reads, Listens, Views 8/26

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The Atlanta Journal and Constitution used this caption: William Andrews had 1,567 yards rushing and 609 yards receiving in 1983, a rare 2,000-yard season. Peter Brouillet / WireImage

Third week of the preseason and those training camp battles are being decided. Thank you to those of you who are making the Rookie Scouting Portfolio Blog a part of your regular reading schedule. As I’ve been saying weekly, if you like what you’ve seen thus far, please consider these three acts of kindness:

  1. Subscribe to this blog. It’s free.
  2. Share this blog with your friends.
  3. Send me feedback.

And then consider performing one special act of kindness to yourself: Get my publication The Rookie Scouting Portfolio. Those who buy it love it.

The RSP is a 120-150 page rookie report loaded with Continue reading →

Five Bold NFL Predictions

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Stop by and grab a cold one, I feel like making some bold predictions (BTW-best use of office supplies ever!). Photo by Muteboy.

I don’t get a chance to sit at the local bar and talk football very often because I’m always writing about it. At the moment I’m feeling like having a long neck on a stool. Since I can’t, I’m at least going to imagine what I would be talking about with a friend of mine if the subject of the NFL came up during our conversation. Pull up a stool and order a drink. Continue reading →

Emerging NFL Talents: QB John Beck

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Mike Shanahan thought John Beck was the best quarterback in a draft class that included JaMarcus Russell, Kevin Kolb, Brady Quinn, Troy Smith, and Trent Edwards. Hardly a great group in hindsight, but you could say the same about Tom Brady's class with one noted exception, Brady's fellow sixth-round classmate. Photo by simplistic.designs http://www.flickr.com/photos/simplistic-designs/

Although my takes on the players in the next series of posts might be useful to fantasy owners, this isn’t a fantasy football article. I’m not projecting stats. I’m writing about talented players whose portfolio of work reveals techniques and behaviors that I think translate well to the NFL game. At the end of the year, you might look at the stats and conclude that the quantity of the production wasn’t eye-catching for each of these emerging talents. However, I believe their work will be impressive enough for opposing teams, fans, and more astute fantasy owners to take future notice.

Prologue

Once upon a time there was a Division I college quarterback. He had the minimum physical dimensions for NFL consideration, but he wasn’t an athletic phenomenon. The school he played for was a major program, but it was not a known commodity for quarterbacks. The lack of these quality bullet points on this player’s resume contributed to a lower draft stock. A noted exception were those who study film closely. These tape grinders saw a quarterback with an exceptionally quick release, good accuracy, and solid decision-making. Some of these analysts, (specifically this one) rated this quarterback among the top 3-4 in this class.

It didn’t make much of a difference. The quarterback was a sixth-round pick for a team that needed a better passer. But as with most sixth-round picks, that quarterback was waived.  The team didn’t regarded him as a player to develop. While this is speculation on my part, said player likely didn’t receive enough reps to even make an impression. Six years later, the team that cut our hero made a trade for a signal caller who turned this franchise around – much in part to a new head coach who I think might have taken a greater interest in our hero if the timing were right. But reality dictated that for the next five years this team would falter in large part to inconsistent quarterbacking. Continue reading →